Every once in a while, I decide that I want to have style. I don't mean that I want to be fashionable, I mean I want to have my own consistent style. Style of dress, lifestyle, everything.
Some argue that everyone has style. What you do, how you dress, what you say, that's your style. And while I agree that's true, I sometimes long for a different style. Fo me, the key phrase is "consistent style".
I always thought it would be wonderful to be suave and debonair, to travel light, to have clothes and jewelry that exhibit simple grace and beauty.
And then there's the part of me that likes bold floral prints, bright colors, and grins like a madwoman over flowers and cool code hacks. This part of me is clumsy but practical, who packs a lot, but is always prepared.
Travel is usually what brings on this particular bit of angst and his time is no exception. Do I try to live my ideal of simple, light and confident? Or do I accept that I'm always going to be a little goofy, a little over-prepared, and admit that I don't know everything?
At this point in my life, I know who I am. Is it wrong that I want to change that? Or is changing who you are part of life? I once heard it said that only when you stop growing do you start dying. I'm still growing, but accepting myself would also be changing who I am. Perhaps that is the worthier goal.